Category Archive

The ways we spend and don’t spend money have such rich information about both our internal landscapes and how we interact with the world.

The next time you’re standing in a store and you see something you want, try this short exercise:

Move out of the aisle into a quiet spot, or go into the rest room. Look at or visualize your object of desire. Now, find where it is in your body that you want. It may be a watering in your mouth, a fluttering in your stomach, some muscle tension.

This sensation is not good or bad. There is no need to figure out if the sensation is telling you “buy” or “don’t buy.” Your only job is to notice that this is what your body is creating in response to this desire, today, in this store.

Notice if any statements like these come into your mind:

The kids need this.

The kids would like this.

“You spend too much!”

I never get to have anything!

I should get this.

“You don’t need this!”

Check in again with your body. What are you feeling now, in your chest, your gut, your arms, your face?

There is no hidden agenda here of “spend less money, you over-consumer!” You may, in fact, do well to spend more, especially on certain things. How can you know how much to spend if you don’t know your internal landscape? Right now, we just want to see what’s there. You’ll learn how to access your own internal wisdom to guide you in spending decisions. If there is any “agenda,” it would be to learn to give yourself what truly satisfies you.

Jean did the mindful spending exercise I wrote about in Mindful Spending, Part 1.  She had this experience a few days later:

“I realized I was driving behind a Mercedes when the driver stopped for no apparent reason.  I began judging: rich, entitled people. Bad.

When we both got to the stoplight, I noticed there were three women in it. Rich, snotty people. Arrogant. They think they’re better than you. They don’t need cars like that. Nobody needs to spend that kind of money on a car.

Next I noticed I was judging, so began to just look at the car. I thought, good quality. I asked myself if I’d like one, a pertinent question as I’m in the process of buying a new car.

I then became aware of feeling very uncomfortable. Status symbol, status symbols are bad, ostentatious display of wealth, wealth is bad, is wealth bad? “

When we want to find the roots of our “ancient, twisted karma,” there is such benefit to first seeing what is in our internal landscapes before doggedly making ourselves spend less. Jean was surprised to discover these thoughts and feelings within herself, as she’ been working on her “poverty mentality” for quite some time. Maybe there are times she should spend more money than she initially feels comfortable with. But she won’t know that, either, until she learns more about her poverty consciousness, the beliefs that maintain it, and whether or not she wants to continue holding these beliefs.

“In the meantime, though, I still need a new car,” she said. “My raggedy ’97 Chevy has the paint wearing off on the roof, and I’m embarrassed for my co-workers to see it. Talk about the embodiment of poverty mentality!

“There’s no need for me to get this all figured out first. The point is, I’m working on it.”